Where is His Mother?
Many years ago, I returned to the Lord after a youth spent in rebellion. I was drawn back to him by his love, wooing, and the drawing by his Holy Spirit in many very personal ways. He made the experience so personal that it was something I would never again forget.
The world had never filled me with such love and compassion, given me the security that I found in him. The things of the world fell far too short to compare to my Jesus. I received the Baptism of the Holy Spirit during the Jesus movement of the 70’s and the time of the Full Gospel Businessmen's meetings. It was all so foreign to me! I was still a young mother of four children, basically raising them on my own.
I fell in love with Jesus. He wasn't a name or a character that I studied about in Sunday School any longer. He became real to me forever! He wasn't just the one that the preachers preached about anymore. He was mine and I was his.
This was a time that the Lord moved mightily among his people. A wave of the outpouring of the Holy Spirit came and overflowed into people that knew nothing of such a thing. Many were saved and many prodigals returned, many miracles and healings took place, both spiritual, emotional and physical.
It was during this outpouring, having been filled with his Holy Spirit, that I had my first vision. It was to encompass many years and many things. This vision was so profound to me at that time because I didn't know the Word of God. I was starting out with just a Sunday School knowledge of children's stories. It was to become an anchor to me for the rest of my years and a plumb line that I had to examine myself by and use often the rest of my years. I learned a principle from this experience with our Lord that has helped me to stay in his will even at the expense of my own and to will to do his will at all costs. All we do or try to do, if it isn't what he wills us to do, is for naught. Jesus only did and said what he saw the father say and do. We are his children if we obey him. Those that obey Him are the Sons of God.
I was married to an alcoholic, a very violent abuser. We had four children and had lost baby by the time I was 21 years old. I was not raised to live this way and how it must have hurt my mother and father to know and to hear and to see what we lived through. Their plan for me was to have a good college education and go on to do great things to make the world a better place.
That was my dream too! At a young age, I would lay out on the green grass and dream and talk to the Lord. I would spend many solitary hours in the woods at a tender age seeking the one that brought me such joy in his presence. Even though I didn't fully understand it, I had a love for God that had been there for as long as my little mind could remember.
I was a dreamer! I dreamed and hoped and planned and then had all my dreams and hopes shattered over many years, 25 to be exact. I got to the point of asking, “Is it worth dreaming for any better life than this? Is there anything else? Is there no deliverance for me and my children?” There had to be something better or life was not worth living!
I lived to see that my children were raised as best I could under the circumstances. I wanted to protect them and give them a chance at growing up and having a better life. They did, praise the Lord! God brought us through with sound minds and kind hearts, giving people. After living the way we had to, we all have compassion for the down and out, those that need help or intervention. I thank God for that preservation and restoration daily!
To get back to the story of my first vision from God… (I had to be told that it was definitely a vision from the Lord, for I had never heard of such a thing. I saw myself walking through the bottom floor of a school with children and a man as if it were parent teacher day. We were looking at all the things the children had drawn and had put up on the walls when suddenly the building began to shake and big cracks opened up in the walls and floors. Everyone panicked and we were terrified. As much as I was afraid of my husband, I was more afraid of what was happening and as he grabbed my hand, we ran.
I then found myself in the middle of a blinding sand storm in the desert. I was so ignorant that I didn't realize that we had a desert in the United States and thought it must be Arabia or some place like that. If I had known more about spiritual things, I would have known that it was God sending me to the desert three years later during the sand storm season of February, with the sand blowing so hard it would take the paint off of cars and it hurt you when it blasted against your flesh. Sand storms are dangerous and not any fun.
I stood amazed at what I was seeing in the vision. I first saw the baby Jesus in a manger like animal crib, laying there alone and crying. The sand was beating him so badly and no one was trying to take care of him or cover him, or help in any way. I looked up and saw some women, each with their own child in their arms, covering them with their garments as they stood beneath a wind break. They were under a shelter and taking care of their own, but no one was taking care of Jesus as he cried.
It absolutely broke my heart and I fell to my face and was crying out, “Where is His mother? Where is His mother, Where is His mother?” Even though they took care of their own, not one made any attempt to even cover him up or bring him into the shelter. He was left there alone in the stinging, burning sand that beat him as he cried.
I will never forget it as long as I live. My heart’s cry was to be that very thing ~ His mother. One day as I studied my Bible, which had now become my custom, devouring it as if I couldn't get enough of what God had to say, I ran across the scripture that said, "whoever does the will of my father who is in heaven, he is my... mother.” Matt 12:50
I found out who His mother is and I will never forget it. When I came to really hard places of decisions and difficult choices, I was always, from that time on, faced with the question of of obedience and choosing to be His mother or be as those others, only looking out for their own. The others were his, they were dressed the part, they were covered, but their hearts were not on Jesus! Their hearts sure were not on being on being obedient if they never acted towards him as a mother! They were content to take care of their own and that was all. God's will was not being done, or he would have had a mother out of the bunch!
I resolved in my heart, as best I could I would become one of his mothers and always try to be led by His Spirit and do His will. If not, I would be like the others that broke my heart and I am sure His too. It just boggled my understanding! How could you let a baby be beaten by this driving sand storm and make no effort to cover or help him?
This scene has stayed with me for over 30 years and has been a plumb line and a level for my life. It has helped me to do many things I would have found impossible to do if I hadn't known it was the will of the Lord.
Betty Nelms
